Monday, July 21, 2008

The End of the Affair

I am appalled. I am hurt. I feel betrayed. I need to refill my Xanax prescription (to those commenters who have been making fun of Xanax, you need to realize that Western Civilization is founded on the cornerstone of Xanax), and I think I will wash it down with some Grey Goose. If that doesn't work, I guess I'll have to catch the next flight to China and console myself in an opium den.

What's the problem you ask? Weeeeellllllllll, it's kind of like a relationship that's starting to go bad when you get the first sign of hurt & betrayal. However, the relationship is not with a person this time (that's probably why until now it's been one of the best relationships I've ever had). It's with a certain movie rental agency. For their protection and to save their reputation with those who haven't yet gotten to this point, I won't name them in this post.

I've always loved this company--almost to the point of addiction. They have all the stuff I can't find at my local branch of Movie Gallery. I had a Blockbuster card, too, which is mostly useless now because it's my friend's, and he has had a copy of "Hannibal Rising"--a shitty long movie, actually--for over a year now. I am sure the video police have him at the top of their most wanted list, and I don't want to risk being picked up and taken to video jail.

Anyway, I love this company because they have so much to choose from. I'm a big fan of British TV, and they have all those series like Father Ted, Prime Suspect, and Midsommer Murders. I love Helen Mirren in Prime Suspect, and Father Ted has to be the funniest bit of irreverence I've ever seen. Also, they have all those arthouse movies that I love and can't see in my local area where most of the movies are designed to appeal to toothless rednecks.

I like to spend quiet mornings over my coffee browsing movies and series and adding them to my queue. THAT is precisely the problem. I found out this week when I was trying to add an American Experience program about Truman that there is actually a LIMIT on the number of movies you can have in your queue. Can you imagine that???? You can store only 500 movies in your queue!!!!! WTF is up with that??? I can't believe that. Soooo many movies, so little of my life left. Well, it's not like I'm actually having much of a life anyway, so if I watch 2 movies a day, I could be through my whole queue in less than a year. Also, it pisses me off that if a series has 2 or more DVDs, they count each one separately. How fair is that?????? Not very. So now what the feck am I supposed to do when I have coffee. And, how am I supposed to make sure I have all the seasons of my favorite series. I just can't stand it. I can't cope. I wonder if I can get my doctor to prescribe me the extra large pharmaceutical dispensing bottle of Xanax that comes with 1000 tablets. I doubt it. So, how much is a ticket to China?

This bit of insanity brought to you by

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Isn't she lovely?


Our first female president?
HEY! IF 28% of the American public can still approve of the Shrub's performance as president, I can believe what I want, too.
I think it would be cool to have a female president, so I'm just going to pretend.
And while I'm at it, I'm going to pretend a few more things....
Like, Americans are environmentally conscious and favor small, fuel efficient cars and oppose disturbing the Alaskan National Wildlife Refuge to satisfy shameless greed.
That the majority of politicians aren't a big bunch of effing clowns serving their own self interests.
The United States stands for principles in opposition to actions such as invading other countries based on lies and deceit.
And torture. We abhore torture.
Yes, our next president will be female....

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Handsome couple

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

doppelgangers


Monday, July 14, 2008

Quote of the Week

Actually, it's more than just a quote.

Been watching Weeds, courtesy of Netflix. For a small fee, of course. Here are a couple of gems to take with you:

Sanjay: I'm starting my own hedge fun, and I'm looking for investors.... Did you know that there are amazing opportunities to be had in the exploitation of emerging third-world countries?

Conrad: There are 370 billionaires in this coungtry and forty million people living under the poverty line. Wake up, 7-Eleven, this is the fvcking third world.

AND....

Rodriquez: Dude, we're the goddam USA. We're the best. We're the coolest, richest, most righteous nation on Earth.

Andy: We're a debt-laden nation of religious hycopcrites. All we do is shop and drive gas-guzzling SUVs.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

A day at the zoo


Monday, July 7, 2008

Grrrrrrr


Brought to you by A. Fekkyn Loonatyk:






~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



"Grrrrrr....."



"Huh?"


"Grrrrrr...."

"What?"

"Grrrrrr...."


"I'm sorry; I don't understand...."


"Grrrrrr...."

"What...what do you want?"


"Grrrrrr...."



"Somebody help me out here. What does it want? What is it trying to say to me?